Step right up, step right up! It’s just what you’ve been waiting for: The Further Adventures of Romer!can (Extended Remix Edition).

Packed with details you’ve never seen before, follow along as Romer!can circumnavigates the urbanity of modern Romania in search of the elusive şaorma. Get all the details in this expanded real-life tale, featuring authentic cameos by a select cast of faithful readers of this very blog.

It’s true; right when you thought you knew the whole story, along comes an entirely new chronicle of selfless pursuit of culinary perfection from Valcea to Talcea. Be the first in your bloc to know the inside scoop.

Ia azi exemplarul tau din Esquire. Valabil exclusiv in Romania.

…make a match, find me a find, catch me a catch.

Meanwhile, way way way up on top of a mountain (not on top of old smokey all covered with cheese), the hundreds years old matrimonial exchange festival was taking place.

Historically, one would have come to buy a wife, but these days it’s mostly beer and mici.

I thought the Romanians (and others) were disgusting for the horrifying practice of ruining great pizza with ketchup.

But our wonderful, southern friends in Bulgaria take culinary tackiness to a new extreme.

Ketchup, mayonnaise, and mustard. Yech.