Sarbatoare Ferecit
For some inexplicable reason, there were a number of identical white envelopes slapped into each and every mail box in my apartment block today. They were hand delivered. None of them had an address, name or stamp affixed to them which usually means it’s an advertisement.
Americans might be surprised at the notion of a lack of a stamp. In the Soviet Socialist Republic of America, it is actually a federal crime to put anything inside a mailbox unless it has postage affixed. Individuals may be fined up USD $5,000 per infraction. Organizations, up to $10,000 per instance.
Meanwhile, in the free-wheeling bastion of libertarian paradise, Romanians are free to shove anything they want inside your mailbox without needing a stamp. Coupons, business cards, flyers, notes, catalogs, ads, adverts, and even advertisements.
Then again, in Romania, I’ve never seen anything with similitude to a letter or package which had paid postage on it that did not require me to report myself to the assigned People’s Communal Postal Collective Facility Co-operative Department for the Romanian Bureau for the Office of Ministry of Poşta Affairs in order to surrender my passport and volunteer for interrogation of crimes against the state.
But I digress…
In my excitement, I tore open the envelope with trembling hands. There was a greeting card inside. Someone was thinking of me. Me. What could the important message be? I just had to know!
Holy amazement, Şatman! I was momentarily blinded by the glorious colors striking me with such festive charms and warm glowing love. A touching arrangement of heart-felt joyousness was splayed out tenderly before me, ripe for the taking.
Upon a grass mat, symbolic of rural Romanian work ethic and all that is good about our great-grandparents who toiled endlessly for various masters over the centuries, was layed out a bundle of precious wheat — the very backbone of bread which is essence of Romanian cuisine — encompassed in dandelion weed flowers.
Breathtakingly colored eggs hand-crafted by artisans (possibly disciples under direct tutelage by Nicolae Grigorescu) were followed by a single, incomplete egg made of gold which seem to foretell of wealth to be fall me according to the sender’s unspoken wishes.
Atop it all, in the glory of Jesus, was superimposed some burning Christmas candles, to keep me warm in this late April winter weather, snuggly nestled in a wreath of Christmas holly to invoke images of the saviour’s twig and berries.
I felt exhaulted in holy hosannah highest! The light of love was filling every void within me and beginning the healing I’ve needed so much since my soul was cleft in twain by recent political horsepucky. Someone cared enough to send the very best.
But who?
I thought perhaps one of my stalkers readers had tracked me down and my espionage cover was blown. Yet, it had to be someone else because they’d used a buckshot scatter approach to spam the neighborhood instead of targeting me. Perhaps I wasn’t so special afterall.
Unable to take the agony any longer, I pried open the card to discover my secret admirer was none other than…
…the sub-mayor of Sector 5 in Bucureşti, the one and only Daniel Marian Vanghelie. The premonitions of C. Ovidiu are coming true; the antics of this politician already seem to be rewarding me with ample blog fodder.
What could be next?
Perhaps a scandal showing Vanghelie used public funds to design, print, and/or distribute these political reminders and brand-building tools while shuffling the spreadsheets to show it was money from his own pocket?
Oh, heavens no!
Ever since the corruption-riddled PSD political party kicked Vanghelie out of their party for supposedly being extraordinarily corrupt beyond even their unfathomable depths, Danny Boy has been working hard to keep his nose clean.
So, they let him back into PSD and made him co-captain of Bucureşti.
As a deeply religious family man, Vanghelie just wanted to inform me that the rising (presumably on hot air) of his Romanian Orthodox God has given him the privilege to wish me a Happy Passover (Easter)… and something about a much better souffle teasca.
Pardon me while I revel in the sincerity of friendship on this Easter Thursday.
April 27th, 2007 at 10:31 am
he also thought of me. Me! Have you noted in what capacity he has signed? None, mere citizen! I like English because it makes it plain clear: capacity has to do quantity and nothing to do with quality. In Romanian I would have had to say in what quality he has signed, which obviously is not the case regarding “care este!”.
April 27th, 2007 at 10:40 am
Hmm- my suspicions were aroused as well when I received that card in my mailbox late last week: “A card? For me?” And then I noticed that the trash box next to my building’s post boxes was overflowing with them. How’s that for a commentary on local politics? (Or perhaps a commentary on the pounds of fliers we get each day, I’m not sure.) I live on the edge of Sector 1, so either your politician got confused or they handed these out to all of them and it was a Paste junk mail free last week all over the Buch.
By the way- I’ve enjoyed your blog a lot, as have all of the exiles-for-the-year to whom I’ve recommended it.
April 27th, 2007 at 12:14 pm
I live in Sector 4 and I still received it, although I can’t vote for his reelection as he’s not in my constituency… Maybe it all has something to do with PSD’s drive to salvage what’s left of its popularity before the referendum to oust the president from his office? If that’s the case, I have to say that the attempt is quite pathetic. They’re probably desperate and they don’t have the decency to spare us the details of their last ghasps for air before they drown.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:40 pm
Fabulous description of all the symbolism in the card, how NOVEL!
April 27th, 2007 at 10:30 pm
monsoux – You got one? Unbelievable. You live so far away from me that it may as well be Mars. Let us agree that his capacity has no quality. Asa e, nu? ;]
parkbench – Welcome to the show! Sector 1? This is start to sound like something of an invasion. While my particular block doesn’t have a trash can (and I’ll have to look into that seemingly obvious oversight), I doubt there was much of an impression made upon any constituents below the age of 60. Over? Maybe they’d cut him some slack.
Tudor – Welcome to the show! Sector 4? Definitely an infection going on here. Is it because Dan is now co-captain of Bucuresti? Whether you like PSD or not, should the party really allow Vanghelie to be in a position of leadership? Does it not disserve the citizens of Sector 5 and all residents of Bucuresti if PSD considers him to be worthy of leadership? Is that all we deserve? If so, it shows contempt for each and every one of us. On the other hand, if you’re right, then I look forward to the sound of silence.
WD – I hope you got a chuckle out of that. A few minor details are thrown in only for the most discerning readers, of which I count you as one. ;]
April 28th, 2007 at 3:07 am
Romerican, there is quite too much going on in your message for me to be able to answer concisely. Therefore, I’ll try to address the issues one by one.
Vanghelie is a disgrace to his party and shouldn’t be allowed to run anything by any standards. However, the sector he sheppherds (i.e. Sector 5) does not have the best population mix of our fair city. Sector 5 has a significant gipsy element, which is sensitive to the fact that, although he will never admit it, Comrade “Marean” is a gipsy himself. His constituency also covers a lot of areas mostly inhabited by workers brought in by the communists to work in the then ever developping industry of Bucharest. These people are not highly educated, they have difficulties establishing financial independence and are therefore more susceptible to the blatant policy of bribery and charity practiced by the mayor “care este”. Add the helpless pensioners who have always been PSD’s captive electorate and you’ve got the sad picture of Sector 5. It is probably the only sector of Bucharest that could have ever elected him and he holds it in a pretty tight grasp. After all that’s what people meant when they warned you that yours is not exactly a good neighbourhood. I know you expected “bad” to mean unsafe and violent, but Romania is not accustomed to judge unsafe by Detroit standards. For us bad means anything that has any reported cases of violence, a generally low living standard and a “not quite of our class” population.
As for whether or not the citizens of Sector 5 deserve better, I can only resort to a piece of judgement passed by Winston Churchill. I don’t remember the exact quote, but the idea was this: “The beauty of democracy is that each people gets exactly the leadership they deserve”. In other words, if you’re stupid enough to vote the guy in, don’t complain that you have to pay the price. After all, Vanghelie never surprised by threachery on the scale of what Tariceanu and PNL have done. He has always been known for his incompetence and corruption, especially after his first term. You do realise he’s got there by being reelected, don’t you?
On account of PSD dying out, I’m afraid it’s mostly my wishfull thinking. No matter how pathetic their campaign is, there will still be some halfwitts it this country to vote for them. Socialism/communism always thrives on incompetence, idiocy, lack of education, people’s lack of pride, and their apetite for handouts. Unfortunately, we still have plenty of those. Fortunately, the Internet feedback shows that there are more and more people they can no longer fool so easily. Even journalists seem bewildered by the loss of their power to lie and manipulate. But will this be enough to make the people go and vote? I don’t know…
On a different note, my fears are amplified by the fact that some of the movements of these worms that call themselves our political class can hardly be explained by anything else than obeying commands from Moscow. And if that’s the case, there might be dire ramifications. Since 1989 I have kept up the hope that democracy has the power to cleanse the system of that special breed of traitors. But I’m now becoming increasingly certain that this plague can’t be cleaned without some convenient “accidents” and the like.
My grandfather used to work in a senior position within the ministry of defence up to 1988, and I can’t tell you how many of the rats even Ceausescu had sidelined on suspicion of being KGB are up and about. I won’t go into any details on that subject, because I don’t think it would be a good ideea. All I can tell you is that I keep seeing the same rats over and over again, and the same bastards supporting them in my everyday discussions.
Anyway, untill the referendum, there’s still hope…
April 28th, 2007 at 7:08 pm
Ladies and gentlemen! I must confess I received two such items- one at home, in beloved sector 5, and another one at work, in another sector. the second one was sent by mail, and had my name and workplace on it. Well, that means I’m in some way in Vanghelie database? for which reason? My liaisons with Primarie, PSD being equal with zero… I’m confused…
April 30th, 2007 at 8:47 am
Let me add myself to the innocent victims…although I live in 2nd district (sectorul 2), guided by another PSD star, Nicolae Ontanu.
My idea was that, since Vanghelie lives in Sectorul 2, he’s trying to steal from the competion (?!) or maybe he plans to run for another term in this sector…Heaven forbid ! :-))
April 30th, 2007 at 2:05 pm
Tudor – I appreciate the input, very much. I think it adds to my burgeoning understanding of the neighborhood around me. I’ve encountered a few Roma here and a few there, but I guess I should expect to find additional pockets and enclaves based on what you’ve shared.
You’re correct in summarizing what I took “bad” neighborhood to mean. Precisely correct. Given how you’ve described the Romanain version of bad, I wonder if my old place in Brasov would also be considered bad. While there weren’t any acts of violence that I directly witness, there was the occasional standoff between agitated males coming close to throwing blows, a definite sense that most of the young men in the neighborhood were without class (being ethnic Romanian notwithstanding), and a general presence of lower income families (including pensioners).
I don’t agree with Churchill or anyone else who cops out by such phraseology. I do think it’s easier to be dismissive of an area’s potential for improvement when you don’t live there. And I think, in general, it’s easier to shrug one’s shoulders in apathy than to criticize (which is already easy enough, thus my point…).
Sectorului 5 deserves better. Education, lack of income, and ethnicity should not be automatic necessarily debilitating factors in the effort to improve an area. Please bear in mind that I’ve come from a place with it’s own deep history in presuming to know what a particular race of people can or cannot do and shrugging off any calls to assist improvement by relegating them to the hopelessness of “meh, they’re poor and uneducated; what can you do?” So, I’ve got a little friendly baggage in that regard and refuse to believe there’s nothing to be done about it.
I suppose the odds are that PSD will not die out. It could evolve over time. And most certainly would, if the right pressures were placed on it. An incredibly lame analogy for me to use would be to say it’s got some alcohol poisoning and while a liver might eventually sort things out, at a health cost, the real cure is a stomach pumping. I’m pro-lustration. I don’t think the investigations are deep enough and I don’t think the restrictions/limitations are tough enough. It’s a lie and phrase when self-interested politicians pretend the country would fall apart without the ‘experience and leadership’ of the old guard. I’m a radical in that sense.
For fun and giggles, you may enjoy reading through this interesting piece.
mutz – You must be the chosen one! So privileged to have received not one, but two of these brilliant branding pieces from the esteemed mayor from the right honorable sector cinci.
Dana_H – Thanks for the report. District 2, eh? I’d say it’s a route; we’ve been overrun with co-captain propaganda. Could be a brilliant tactic to out-maneuver his intraparty opponent for leadership of orasul? Oi vey!
Nicolae Ontanu? Hmmm, do you think there’s enough material floating around for me to write a healthy round-up bit on all the local PSD mafia clowns? I’ll think it over, but any more input on the subject is welcome!
April 30th, 2007 at 8:59 pm
Well, you may start by offering him a helping hand and suggesting to change the web design of City Hall’s website, it’s simply awwwwwful…:-)
http://www.ps2.ro/
Otherwise, the district is already famous by this image :
http://www.sictir.org/node/385
whose attached comment “Question for driver’s license exam: which car leaves the X-ing first: 1) Tram, 2) the truck 3) the trolleybus’ has no right answer yet :-)
May 7th, 2007 at 1:41 pm
as a “coleg de sector 5″, it’s always fun to read your entries. great job
May 13th, 2007 at 4:00 am
Auzi, madam romerican, tu te plictisesti rau, nu asa!?!?! Te preocupa niste subiecte, de sta matu’n coada!!! Vrei sa-ti traduc, sau te descurci?
Din felul in care comentezi despre Romania, nu prea o ai la suflet. Pai si atunci de ce nu te apuci tu sa tii un blog despre ceva mai apropiat tie, gen Togo, Trinidad Tobago, samd…
Da, nu e locul perfect de pe planeta, se lucreaza inca la asta, si o sa mai dureze, dar, te rog eu, lasa figurile astea de neprihanita abuzata sexual de vreo 10 negri mititei, ca ma(ne) seci…
June 21st, 2007 at 2:49 pm
people are stranger